Recently I was asked to recall my weirdest experience and I decided that I should write it down because I think that it is pretty frickin awesome.
So, I was living in London and every day I would make the commute from West Hampstead to Moorgate. Moorgate is a pretty busy station being in the heart of the city so it can be pretty manic with people everywhere.
One day I was in a rush and wasn’t really concentrating as I rushed through the station. I was also in the process of rolling myself a cigarette whilst trying to locate my oyster card. What can I say? I’m a multi-tasker. Anyway, I was home and dry through the barriers and made a last minute decision to exit a different way than usual. I didn’t look and before I knew it I was practically on top of a smart looking gentleman dwarf. Now, I didn’t want to crash into him – he may have thought that it was some kind of anti-dwarf attack and I didn’t want that so instead I decided to hop with both feet away from him. Needless to say, I misjudged my sideways hop and tripped over him – I never claimed to be an athlete. I tripped over a dwarf and fell flat on my face.
When I gained my composure I looked up wondering whether or not I had been in a sleep deprived state and had imagined it but alas, the guy was standing there. He offered a hand and helped me up whilst I apologised profusely. He just looked at me, smiled and said “there’s one to tell your mates” and then he disappeared in a cloud of smoke. Ok, the smoke thing is a lie but he disappeared pretty sharpish.
So, I was pretty stunned but my embarrassment was confirmed by a group of young guys who were pointing and laughing. I thought about the kind dwarfs words and realised that I would indeed tell my friends but without video evidence what would be the use. I approached the station office and asked if it would be possible to review the cctv footage. When asked why, I recalled the story in disbelief to which the guard laughed, told me that there was no way I was seeing the footage but telling me that he would enjoy a look. He then slammed the door in my face. What a great guy.