January 13, 2010

Bless me god damn it.....

Here is something that has bothered me for a while and I thought that it would be a good idea to get it off my chest. Whilst living in London I used to encounter an old man on the Jubilee Line who took an instant disliking to me and I have never known why.

So this guy used to walk up and down the train carriage with a cross and he would bless people. The first time that I saw him I thought “oh here we go. Another crazy. Lucky me, no doubt he will decide to hug me”. As he neared the guy opposite and I shared a look of shared amusement that he was blessing every body. When he reached me – he stopped, hesitated and then moved on to the next person without blessing me. What? Suddenly I was hurt that he had chosen not to bless me. What was wrong with me? Could he detect the devil in me or something? Should I be worried? Should I enquire to my parents as to whether or not they sold my soul to the devil as a baby for their new car? What was his problem?

 The guy opposite looked at me in pity and I am pretty sure that the person next to me edged slightly further away. Since when has someone been determined as Satan spawn by a crazy man on the tube? Needless to say I couldn’t stand the sideways looks from the other passengers and I quickly departed the train! I was ousted by a crazy man.

As time passed, I managed to convince myself that the reason he didn’t bless me was because I don’t need blessing, I don’t need help. I am all good. So I managed to move on. Recently I returned to London after living in Australia for a year and low and behold who should I encounter on the tube – the crazy man with the cross. “Yes” I thought. Finally I could see whether this time he would bless me and as he moved along the carriage harassing passengers my pulse quickened in anticipation.  He reached me, tilted his head to one side and then moved on. The fucker didn’t bless me again. It was as if he was taunting me. 

Now, I’m not one to dwell on things but if I ever see him again I am going to stand up and chase him after he passes me by and then I am going to annoy him until he blesses me. Not very mature I grant you but totally necessary. So until the time comes, I will lie in wait. My time will come, oh yes, it will come.


  1. my my pleas dont mind but your post is so interesting it made me as loughed that my eyes became wet you are blessd dear such a nice writer god bless you

  2. This has to be the funniest post I have read today. But comedy aside, strangely, I felt like I could relate to you, you know.

    The crazies are crazy, it's obvious as day, but the fact that they chose to treat you differently than the rest was kind of disturbing, especially to a disturbed mind like me. Ha ha ha.

    My advice would be for you to watch him closely in your next encounter. See if he randomly singles out some people while he blesses some random poor souls.

    A word of wisdom: Try not to stalk the poor crazy cross guy while you're trolling for cute men in the subway. :p

    shanaz | My Reverie