It's that time of the week again. Monday. Even the word fills me with dread and makes me feel slightly nauseous.
The feeling starts creeping up on me around 7.30 pm on a Sunday. Everyone can feel it, the end of the weekend of fun, friends and frivolity-you can't help but get a little glum. Another week is upon us, another 5 days where it's slightly frowned upon to drink excessively and go out dancing.
No matter what I have been up to over the weekend, Monday's always suck. This is for a multitude of reasons, allow me to elaborate.
Firstly, it's Monday which means that as a woman, this is the day that the diet officially starts again. It's no longer justifiable to eat a whole pot of ice cream, drink one too many sugary cocktails or eat a meal that weighs more than you do. Or in fact eat 46 chicken nuggets between three of you at the 24 hour McDonalds round the corner at 5am. Sadly, this is what I did this weekend. Classy. Ah well, as I said - the diet starts today. Bring on the lentils.
Somehow at the weekend, despite knowing that you shouldn't eat something - you use the fact that from Monday onwards you will be good, as an excuse. And, it's the perfect excuse. I feel that this demonstrates very aptly why weekends are so enjoyable. Anything can be justified.
Monday also signifies the day that you have to exercise. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy exercising as much as it's possible to enjoy exercising but when Monday comes around, I always feel pressure to do it and if you're anything like me, you'll also feel that pressure sucks.
I find that because everyone has the same idea, the gym is a flamin' nightmare. It's a battle for a machine. It becomes an out and out war to reach that treadmill before the next person hops on and if you dare to stay on the machine longer then the recommended '15 minutes at busy times' then you can feel the angry eyes staring at you and can hear the 'tap, tap, tap' of unhappy feet as they look at the clock and back at you and then to the clock again before emitting steam from their ears.
I've tried to beat the nightmare of the Monday evening gym by going swimming. Big Mistake. Unless you like being kicked in the head and ribs and having the person behind you's head way too close to your crotch for comfort then I would advise avoiding this too. Unless of course, you like that kind of thing.
No-one ever does anything fun on Monday's. It's the day of the week that all you want to do is come home and sit in front of the TV (after you've exercised and had a healthy dinner that is). If anyone even dreams of suggesting doing something they are always met with the same answer. A resounding 'No'. I like to be left to wallow in my Monday misery on my own with only the company of rubbish TV.
Another reason to hate Monday's is the fact that it's the day that you finally have to address that 'To-Do List'. Admit it, by Thursday and Friday your drive to cross things off the list has lessened and you just think 'Bugger it, i'll do it Monday'. Hence, Monday becomes the day that you put everything off until.
Basically, Monday is the day that you have to be sensible and that is why it sucks. I suppose that when it draws around, every week without fail, you will have to take joy from the simple things like crossing off your 'To-Do List' with multi-coloured pens. That's how I get myself through.